Kings Cup Brief has been updated - our apologies that the format did not do justice to George's hard work! And indeed to Chris' write up of the event. - Click More to see the full text

Published 07:04 on 8 May 2023

When I first heard from Commodore, Sarah Rose, The King's Cup, my mind turned to the famed drinking game and the need to man the Club bar

When I last heard of Author and sailor, Patrick Palmer, he was broken down in a country famous for guillotining Kings, Queens and Austrian Princesses.

The conjunction of these two memories resulted, late Wednesday night, in a What's App "Mayday" from Phil Selwood with a request to participate in the dubious privilege of producing a report for the club website. This was to commemorate the Worthing Sailing Club King's Cup, an event which had taken place the day following the Coronation of Charles 111.

This would not be the first time I have written about Club events, but this was certainly one for which I was least prepared. With advance knowledge, I usually try to keep an eye on the multitude of activities other than the immediacy of my own boat: both monos and cats. Nevertheless, there were some memorable even humorous moments and if nothing else, I was up for some humour and accordingly, agreed to give it a try.

George Schlich turned out to be the lucky Race Office foisted with the management of the event. To that end, apparently, he was assisted by Barry Peters who, following an unexpected stay in hospital, has become something of a welcome permanent feature in the club race box recently, proffering both advice and wisdom to those of us who believe that two heads can be better than one. (just wish he'd speak up a bit so we can hear what he is saying!!!)

What, however, I was unaware of was George's ability as both poet and raconteur, an attribute about which became only too clear when, wearing his Waitrose Crown, he briefed us all regarding the forthcoming event.

The full text of what he said in his poetic briefing is so long that I have taken the liberty of attaching it as as an appendix, thus giving you the opportunity to skip the remainder of this monologue and read instead the excellent scribing of Worthing's answer to Robert Burns. I am bound to admit that somewhere in the middle it reminded me of "She sells seashells on the sea shore" Nevertheless, I feel bound to give you the piece de resistance of the final stanza which was pure Edgar Marriott (Ed Stanley Holloway) reading

"But should the course,

not to your liking be,

It was Barry wot done it,

Not me! "

Viewed from above, the locus of the aforementioned shape was that of a four-pronged crown whose vertices were due South and to be sailed to port. The North,

scalp, portion of the crown was to be a gate formed by two pencil shaped marks which as a minimum had to be sailed to seaward in any manner of the helms' choice. On completion of the vertices, boats were to cross the start finish line. With lines drawn around, it resembled a daisy and as has already been said, if sounded like a recipe for disaster, it was Barry wot done it.

Readers studying the appendix will note there was to be an additional incentive to participants under 16 years of age - well done to young Oakden, Rawlings and Seaman who crossed the line ahead of their contemporaries

A total of 21 boats took to the water amongst which the author crewed for Mercedes. This would give me an opportunity to brush up my Spanish "babor" and its opposite. With Galleons in her DNA, it came a no surprise when we crunched the launch breaking the tiller UJ just as the preparatory flag was raised. A quick dash to the compound was needed to locate a replacement. After two attempts, a serviceable connecting bar allowed us to launch just on the start signal and admire the view of everybody else sailing away on babor towards the west vertex of the crown. To be fair to Mercedes, she was now handling the boat beautifully, in contrast to the author who couldn't tell his colo from his culo having been mesmerised by George's masterly prose and forgotten what he had said.

I am reliably informed that the race box did not have much better idea than anyone else of what was going on, not least Luca Medina who, using Columbian rights of way, ended up withdrawing from la Copa Del Rei following a collision

Overall, many familiar names were out there, their names reflected in the results and smiles on faces when they returned.

There followed a second, Series, event, a rather more conventional layout, by which time the sun had appeared and generally made a nice afternoon. There were two courses, monos and multihulls with one start the latter somehow transforming into three. Somehow, I missed the delay flag and was left wondering why we were alone on the start line. The subsequent general recall, I guess, reflects the competiveness in the WSC DNA and I wish I had been in the Race box to witness the ensuing chaos. Up to then, I had been trying to convince Mercedes to start on the estribor and eventually my wish was granted. With the usual port chaos taking place on the pin, we followed Rob (is there any other verb?) as he it streaked towards the beach put in a tack on the line and sailed due South amidst lots of shouts of "Bastard" (or maybe it was Halyard?)

Well done everyone

And that Ladies and Gentlemen Mesdames Messieurs's, Meiner Damen und Herren, Señores and Señoras etc was the King's Cup

Toodle Pip

Appendix

Kings Cup Briefing by George Schlich

I see you stand like greyhounds in the slips,

straining upon the start, the game's afoot.

The King's Cup

Order of Service:

Dearly Beloved,

We gather today with Commodore

for momentary racing information then wheel to shore.

So welcome Sailor friends and listen up

for a detailed briefing, - it's the King's Cup

and not long after we'll be racing

to celebrate the Coronation.

The weather first, which seems set fair,

with South Westerly direction in the air,

so when it comes to get out sailing,

for those in the know, the wind's prevailing,

The high tide just past six meters,

so I caution

to mind the shore break when you're launching.

Light boats sail swift, though greater hulks draw deep,

The King's Cup is raced as a handicap, a single fleet,

then with numbing maths we'll spin

a timing spreadsheet and declare a win.

Younger Sailors we do invite,

with special reason to race and fight,

as the first three who finish aged sixteen or less,

with an extra prize today we'll bless

And as to the course, on board is shown,

with usual start using flags flown

from the club race box on high

at the end, under the flag, a shape we'll tie.

Now fortune brings in some boats that are not steered,

But it's more like those that steer will them be cheered,

Now in slightly more detail, no doubt you'll say,

you need further guidance to way to proceed, okay, okay? okay

The course is basically a crown,

until you see the shape, you continue round and round and round,

across the start line, mark 1 to port

reach to the gate,

go through shore to sea, see?

on to the next and mark 2 to port

reach to the gate,

go through shore to sea, see?

on to the next and mark 3 to port

reach to the gate and go through

shore to sea, see?

on to the last and to port mark 4,

then once more into the reach, dear friends, once more.

(See what I did then)

Now back to the start and you'll be fine,

provided that you cross the line.

The pattern's clear but I will repeat

take marks to port then back to gate

through from shore to sea. I hope that's straight

Our true desire with new King in place

you really will enjoy the race

but should the course NOT to your liking be,

it was Barry wot done the course, not me.